


Cosima and Delphine go to dim sum

by tatarrific



Category: Orphan Black (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-07
Updated: 2015-05-07
Packaged: 2018-03-29 12:04:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,716
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3895648
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tatarrific/pseuds/tatarrific
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Here’s a bit of gastronomical fluff for #CophineFluffathon on tumblr.  Note: this story may be disturbing to vegetarians.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cosima and Delphine go to dim sum

**Author's Note:**

  * For [OBFrankenfics](https://archiveofourown.org/users/OBFrankenfics/gifts).



“Cosima, I am not certain about this.”  Delphine tugs the lapels of her coat closed, squinting into the biting wind.  They have been staking their spot in the middle of what seems an endlessly winding line for the past half and hour and she is starting to lose feeling in her toes.

“Dude, relax - by my estimate there are about 50 people ahead of us, which means we are definitely getting seated with the first wave.”  Cosima, if anything, seems invigorated by the wait and the cold and Delphine eyes her warily.  Her lover is hopping from foot to foot, arms clasped in excitement even as her breath condenses with every exhale.  Delphine casts a longing look toward the French bistro conveniently located across the street from their current stake-out: it is open, has no discernible line of freezing customers waiting to be seated and, most importantly, serves hot coffee and fresh croissants.

“Ah, no, I meant I am not certain about this,” she gestures toward their current destination.  “I have never had dim sum, I am not an adventurous eater - which you know - and, Cosima, I don’t understand why we can’t just go to a restaurant that does not require us to queue up in the cold for near an hour before it even opens!”

Cosima smirks, raising an eyebrow.  “Queue up?”

“Cosima–”

The brunette raises her hands in appeasement.  “Okay, I hear you.  But, listen - the doors are about to open in five minutes and it would really make me happy if we could try.  This is one of my favorite foods in the whole world.”  Cosima aims a pout in her direction but Delphine stares back, unmoved.  “Oh, man, The Look.  Okay, okay,” this time she sidles up, pulling Delphine in until their noses touch, “They are literally about to open the doors, so how about this - you let me pick out two things - two! - off the cart for you to try, and if you don’t like either, we leave and go get some croissants.  Deal?”

Delphine cants her head, her breath fogging up Cosima’s glasses, then nods once.  “D’accord.  Two things, and then we can leave.”

Cosima beams at her, tugging her along as the line starts moving.  “You won’t regret it, pumpkin, I promise.”

Delphine follows, shaking her head.  “Don’t call me that.”

The restaurant dining room is vast and hectic, servers rumbling with food carts past diners still getting seated, and Delphine trails Cosima closely as she follows the host to their table.

It is all.. too  _much_  for a Sunday morning, and she takes her seat hesitantly, glancing around.  The din of the activity around them seems to be increasing as each cart rolls by, servers hawking their food items in what Delphine is certain is not English, stopping by occasionally if summoned by a diner.  The exchanges seem incomprehensible to her, food ordered in a manner more akin to haggling at a Moroccan bazaar then a sit-down restaurant.

Cosima squeezes her hand and Delphine looks up, but her lover is scanning the room, eyes eagerly tracking one of the food carts as she speaks.  “Okay, here’s how it works, if you see something you like on one of the carts, just let me know.  But since I only get two shots at making you a dim sum convert, I want to make sure I pick the right stuff for you.”

Delphine eyes the contents of the cart moving past them, and nudges Cosima inquiringly.  “What is this?”

“Ah, let’s see.. Looks like Chinese broccoli - delicious, nutritious, but, yeah, not wasting my pick on it.  And, the other thing is, lessee - beef noodles.  Nope.  Next.”

Delphine leans back in her chair, chewing her lip distractedly.  She could kill for a cup of coffee - an espresso, actually - and a nice pastry to go with it.  Something flaky and sweet, maybe an almond croissant, or even an apple tart.  The sound of her stomach growling tears Cosima’s attention from the next cart and she shoots Delphine an apologetic look.

“Oh-kay, let’s get you something to eat, then.  Uh, here,” she signals to one of the servers and he deposits a plate in front of them, “I think you’ll like this.  This is cheong fan, fresh rice noodles wrapped around delicious shrimp.”

Cosima beams at her encouragingly, and Delphine eyes the translucent, slippery ..mass on the plate, but makes no move with her chopsticks.  Cosima nudges the plate toward her.  “Baby frog, just try.  You’re going to like it - you love shrimp.”

Delphine pokes at the food, noting the jiggle of the noodles.  “I do love shrimp but, Cosima, you know I do not appreciate the.. the texture like this.  It’s too slippery.”  Cosima’s eyebrow goes up and Delphine waves her off, picking up her chopsticks.  “Non, it is too early for sexual innuendo.”  Her fingers close around the chopsticks awkwardly, and she attempts to grasp the food with the other end, failing repeatedly.  

“ _Merde_ , Cosima, how am I supposed to eat this?”  Taking one final, desperate stab, Delphine manages to lift a bite up to her lips and opens her mouth for a taste– as the noodle slides off and lands back on the plate with a wet plop.  “ _Putain!_ ”  She tosses her chopsticks back on the table with disgust.  “Is this a- a prank?”

Cosima looks at her with alarm, palms out in a placating gesture.  “No, not a prank, though I realize now that I probably should have let you have a small bite of something before we left.  Your blood sugar level seems to be dropping.”  The brunette looks around nervously, seeking out any other carts coming toward them.  

Delphine takes a deep breath, aiming for calmness.  It is true that she tends to exhibit certain more severe forms of behavior on an empty stomach.  Her mind runs through the list: irritability, check; mood swings, check; increasing agitation, lack of compromise making capabilities, full blown anger, check, check, check - but if Cosima had not devised to looking absolutely ravishable first thing in the morning, they would have had time for a quick bite before having to scramble out the door this morning.   As is, she is pretty sure her bra is clasped closed only half way, and Cosima didn’t even have time to apply her eyeliner before they dashed out the door.  She gives a mental shrug, disassociating herself from any responsibility.  Things being what they are now, the key is to get something edible in her stomach as soon as possible.

Cosima waves down the next cart with a sense of urgency.  “Excuse me, what’s that?” She points at the array of identical bowls on the cart, then scrunches her face in distaste at the answer.

“What was that, Cosima?”

“Ah, tripe.  Let’s see what’s on the next one - I promise there will be something good soon.”

Delphine frowns at the unfamiliar word.  "Tri-pee? What is that?“

"It’s, uh, cow intestines. But I think I see shrimp dumplings coming along - I think you’ll definitely like those.”

Delphine perks up, incredulous. “ _Les tripes?  Mais oui!_ Call them back!”

Cosima stares at her, not moving, and Delphine snaps her fingers at her impatiently.  "Allez, allez, Cosima, the cart is leaving!“

Spurred into action by Delphine’s ire, Cosima bounds after the food cart. When she returns she gingerly places a bowl of steaming cow intestines, the gray color of the dish offset only by a garnish of green onions, in front of Delphine.

"Here is your,” she trails off incredulously as she sees Delphine’s eyes roll back with pleasure with the first bite, “tripe.”

“ _Mmmmon dieu,_  this is divine! You’re not having any? “

Cosima shakes her head, lips firmly pressed together. "Nope. All yours. All of the tripe. Just for you. Ah, finally,” she motions to the next server, “shrimp dumplings, please.”

“Shrimp dumpling, one order.”  The server places a bowl in front of Cosima.  “Anything else?”

Delphine, mid-bite, points at the other item on the cart.  “What is that one, please?”

“This, chicken feet.”

“No, than–”

“Yes!  One order, please.” Delphine claps her hands excitedly.  “This is excellent!  What else do you have?  Cow brains?  Veal kidneys?  Oooh, lamb head?”

The server exchanges a bewildered look with Cosima, placing a bowl of steamed chicken feet squarely in front of the blonde.  “No, only chicken feet.  You can order duck tongues off the main menu, though.”

Delphine lights up.  “Duck tongue!   _Mais_ , I did not know such a thing exists!  Yes, one order, please!”

Nodding, the server departs, leaving behind a stupefied Cosima.  

“Delphine, are you really goin–,” she pauses, pinching the bridge of her nose as Delphine slides a chicken foot in her mouth with a loud slurping sound, “Okay, that’s.. disturbing.  And can never be unseen.”

Delphine leans back in her chair with a sigh, delicately picking out a small chicken bone out of her mouth.  “ _Chérie_ , I  _love_  dim sum.  I had no idea it was going to be like this!”

Cosima shakes her head ruefully, her appetite waning as another tiny bird claw disappears behind Delphine’s lips.  “Me neither, love.  Me neither.  I, uh, thought you weren’t an adventurous eater?”

“Mmmm, I am not - I don’t like the spicy, and the strange textures I don’t like either, but this, Cosima, this reminds me of home.”  She beams happily, sated.  “And duck tongues!  I cannot wait!”

“Cow guts and chicken feet remind you of home?”  Cosima, perturbed, remembers that they are booked to visit Delphine’s family in France in less than a month.  “What happened to croissants and baguettes?”

“Well, yes, of course, but the real food, ah, that is when you get to experience all of the animal.  Maman makes this one dish - she will make it for us when we visit, most certainly - with ground kidney, liver and heart of the baby lamb, and then you stuff the .. how do you say it, the.. stomach lining? with it, and bake it.”  She brings up the tips of her fingers to her lips for a kiss.  “ _Délicieux!_ ”

Cosima opens her mouth, unable to verbalize the tumult of emotions, closes it.  Through the restaurant window she can see the French bistro’s sign blink merrily,  _“Fresh croissants inside”._

There is something, she thinks, to be said of irony.


End file.
